I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
