I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
