He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Randomize