If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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