I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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