so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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