I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
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