Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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