i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
