I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I am available for nakedness
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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