shes about as inviting as chlamydia
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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