this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Randomize
