new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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