she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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