Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
You've changed since you got that strap on
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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