quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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