So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
