By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
is it fun? or sober?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
