i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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