Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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