It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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