Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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