is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize