I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I touched a dick in church today
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
