I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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