you guys were way drunker than both of me
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize