Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
