just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
tell me about the eggs
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