he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Are my feet made of real feet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize