when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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