i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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