it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
