she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
