Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
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We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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