these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
