I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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