CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
