I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
