dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
