Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
