In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
