I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
My breasts were aching with rage.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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