Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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