There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
