I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
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