My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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