Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
