Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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