New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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