how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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